You're Not Alone
by BeyondTheClouds777
Summary: No matter how physically, mentally, or emotionally strong a person is, everyone has a breaking point. Izuku Midoriya is no exception. (Or, the one where Izuku finally cracks under pressure, and Iida and Ochako are there for him.) (MANGA SPOILERS!) (One-shot) (Cross-Posted to AO3)


*****WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS MANGA SPOILERS! ENTER IN AT YOUR OWN RISK!*****

* * *

The first thing Ochako noticed was that Izuku looked like he hadn't slept in a week.

There were dark, bruise-like crescents beneath his eyes, and his posture was sloppy, his movements always sluggish, like his brain took an extra five seconds to register just what it wanted to do _._

And it was seriously beginning to scare Ochako.

"Deku...are you okay?" she asked him during lunch one afternoon, sitting across from him at the table. Izuku stared down at his bowl of steaming rice, like he didn't quite know what to do with it.

"Deku?" Ochako repeated, louder this time, and Izuku's head snapped up, his tired eyes clearing briefly.

"Sorry, what?" Izuku asked.

"...Didn't you hear me?" Ochako already knew the answer to this, though; the confused, dazed look in Izuku's eyes told her all she needed to know.

"O-Oh, no, I didn't, sorry," Izuku said, reaching up and rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "I just spaced out for a minute."

Iida, sitting beside Ochako, regarded Izuku with an air of concern and suspicion. "...You're not eating," Iida stated matter-of-factly, but there was definitely worry in his tone.

Izuku swallowed and looked down at his bowl again like it was a foreign thing. "...I'm not hungry, I guess," he said. "I had a big breakfast, so…"

He was lying. Izuku hadn't so much as _showed up_ for breakfast. She knew something was wrong with him. Something was seriously, _seriously_ wrong with him.

"No, you didn't," Ochako called him out. Izuku flinched for a moment, then raised his head to meet her gaze. He looked something like a kicked puppy. "Deku, if you don't want to talk about it, that's okay, but...you can tell us anything. We're friends, remember?"

 _We're worried about you._

Izuku blinked at them, didn't do anything for a moment or two, then smiled. "I'm alright," he said, finally taking up his chopsticks as though to back it up. "I promise I'm okay. You don't have to worry about me."

The bright smile was the same, and his voice was suddenly chipper. He would have convinced anybody else.

Anybody, except Iida and Ochako, who knew him far too well for that. Ochako could see straight through his facade, could see just what a struggle it was to keep up that smile, just how painful his voice sounded.

She and Iida exchanged a knowing, worried glance. They both knew it. Something was wrong with Izuku.

Something was _drastically_ wrong with their friend.

…

Iida had come to see Izuku as a brother.

Izuku was shy and quiet for the most part, flinching when he was approached suddenly and tripping over his own sentences while trying to explain himself. But he was just as passionate as he was kind, and one of the bravest, most selfless people Iida had ever met, right up there with Iida's older brother Tensei.

However, despite Izuku's generally timid nature, it was unlike him to be like _this_. Suddenly shutting everybody out, suddenly walking with his head down, suddenly ceasing most conversations with his friends, suddenly looking dejected and hopeless…

This was so unlike the Izuku Iida knew that it was almost _terrifying_. And it wasn't just him who was noticing, either; everyone else in Class 1-A seemed to notice something wrong with their usually cheery classmate.

"Hey, you guys notice anything wrong with Midoriya lately?" Kirishima asked the rest of the class after their final lesson for the day; Izuku had left almost as soon as the bell rang, heading back to the U.A. dormitories.

"Like what?" Kaminari prompted.

"I dunno, just somethin' seems... _off_ about him, y'know?" said Kirishima. "C'mon, guys, I can't seriously be the only one who noticed anything."

"Now that you mention it...I _do_ think Midoriya's been acting strange lately," said Momo thoughtfully, resting her chin against her hand. "Do you think it has something to do with the internship?"

"I don't know," said Tsu, tapping her own chin. "But we should probably give him some time and let him think this out himself."

"Yeah, you've got a point there," said Seto. "Trying to get involved might just make him embarrassed. Besides, we aren't allowed to talk about our internships to each other anyways."

Iida understood where the class was coming from, really, he did. He understood that sometimes, it was better to back off a situation and give the person time to themselves, to let them work it out on their own.

However…

...Something told Iida that this was _not_ one of those situations. Something told him (he didn't know if it was his head or his heart) that if he _didn't_ get involved, something really, really bad was going to happen.

So, he pivoted on his heel, told the class he'd be back, and sprinted after Izuku.

He caught up with his classmate in record time. "MIDORIYA!" he hollered. Izuku jumped and spun around, just as Iida caught up with him.

"I-Iida!" Izuku yelped. "What's wrong?"

Iida caught his breath quickly and straightened up. "Midoriya," he repeated, "do you remember what you said to me after my brother was hospitalized, just before I went on a rampage after Stain?"

Izuku blinked at him. He wasn't following.

"You told me that you were there for me, and that I could talk to you about anything," said Iida, answering his own question. "And I want to let you know that the feeling's mutual. You have friends who want to help you, but we can't do anything if you don't let us."

Izuku blinked again. Something else that was seriously bothering Iida was just how _out-of-it_ the usually upbeat, optimistic student looked.

"T-Thanks, Iida," Izuku said, smiling tiredly, but Iida could tell it was fake, it was horribly, _horribly fake_. "I...I appreciate it."

But that was it. That was as far as it went. Iida wanted to press on, to keep asking questions until Izuku finally relented and told him what was wrong, but he didn't.

No, he'd let Izuku have a little more time. Iida's offer was out in the open now, after all. Iida would give Izuku just a bit more time, to see if he came to him directly and explained the situation.

However, if things didn't get better…

...Iida decided he might have to pry a bit further, if just for Izuku's sake.

…

Izuku felt like he was being torn apart from the inside out.

He couldn't pay attention in class anymore; he'd almost drowned during a Search and Rescue training exercise at the USJ, because he was lost in thought; he couldn't sleep at night anymore; his appetite was gone; there were oh so many things running through his head, each one physically, mentally and emotionally draining (and terrifying) in their own right.

When Izuku bore down on his homework papers, his hand was shaking so badly that nothing he wrote down was distinguishable. He was all over the place, and nothing on the assignment even made _sense_ to him. He couldn't remember studying for this.

When he was alone in his own dorm, and everyone else was asleep, he didn't have to worry about keeping up appearances, or smiling for them, or _lying_ to them that everything was "okay" and "alright" even though it most certainly _was not_.

He hated lying to them. _Hated_ it with _passion_ , but he didn't have another choice. He couldn't _tell them_ what was going on. He just _couldn't_.

And he was so _frustrated_. So, so, _so frustrated_ , and sad, and angry, and scared, and panicked, and everything in between. There was just _so much_ he was carrying along with him every day, so much baggage he just couldn't put down.

He was entrusted with secrets heavier than lead with consequences that could cost _thousands of lives_ if he couldn't keep them. And not just that, but there was guilt, too, guilt for choices he had made, regrets of the things he hadn't done.

The sacred secret of One For All. The girl, Eri, who'd begged him to save her, _only he couldn't_. The League of Villains, _murderers_ who were plotting their next move. All Might's foreseen "end." And himself, the next Symbol of Peace.

Thinking about it all...made Izuku physically sick. His chest was tight, and his throat felt constricted. Breathing became a chore.

It was too much. It was just _too much_. One For All...he could keep that under wraps, sure, but then there was Eri, the girl he'd _literally had in his arms_ , yet couldn't save. He _could not save her_. She'd been there, _right there_ , hurt and scared and looking for a savior, for a hero, and…

... _And he hadn't been able to do a single thing to help her_.

The heroes were looking for her now, but if Izuku had only stepped in sooner, if he'd only stood up to Eri's abusive "father," or whatever he was to her, if only he'd _taken her with him…_

He…

...He could have spared her a lot of pain.

He lowered his pencil and put his head in his hands, his shoulders shaking, his breaths coming in short, rattling gasps.

Izuku was coming to the harsh reality that the hardest part of being a hero was the inability to do more.

…

It was all fine and dandy right up until Izuku collapsed.

Iida, Ochako, Izuku and Kirishima were in the common room, the formers trying (and failing) to help the latter finish up a couple homework assignments he'd been struggling with.

Though Ochako and Iida were _supposed_ to be helping Kirishima, they couldn't shake their worry for Izuku, who was in the kitchen making coffee. Over the past couple days, it had become increasingly obvious that Izuku was only faring _worse_. He paid even _less_ attention in class, and most of the time, nobody even knew where he _was_ , since he always retreated back to the dorm after class.

It was getting worse, _way_ worse, and if nothing changed...

Iida opened his mouth to call out to him, but Kirishima beat him to it. "Hey, you okay, buddy?" Kirishima asked, looking over at the kitchen from the couch. "You don't look like yourself. Somethin' up?"

"E-Erm, no, I'm fine," Izuku said, but his voice wavered, so it wasn't convincing at all. "Just kind of worn down…"

"Ya sure?" Kirishima frowned. "You're lookin' kinda pale, man…"

And Kirishima was right. Izuku _did_ look more pale than usual, his hands shaking at their sides, his expression blank and unreadable. More than anything, he looked _tired_.

"Y-Yeah, I-I'm fine, I just…" Izuku raised a trembling hand and set it against his head, his other hand clutching the edge of the counter. "I-I think...I should probably sit down, for a second…"

That was all the warning they received. Izuku's eyes shut, his knees buckled, and he hit the floor in an unmoving heap.

" _Midoriya!"_

" _Deku!"_

The three sprang to their feet in record time and sprinted over; Iida was the first to reach Izuku's side thanks to the quick activation of his Quirk, and he crashed to his knees, reaching out and turning Izuku over in one swift but careful movement. Izuku's lack of response and movement shook Iida to the core.

"Midoriya - Midoriya!" he hollered, shaking Izuku's shoulder. "Midoriya! Answer me!"

"Holy _crap…"_ Kirishima was staring at Izuku like he was corpse. "H-Holy _crap_ …" And then, "Recovery Girl!" he shouted, like it was the answer to a pop-quiz and he'd only just realized it. "I-I'll get Recovery Girl!"

As he was saying it, he was already scrambling away, tripping over the coffee table in his haste before tumbling unceremoniously out the door.

Ochako knelt by Izuku, her eyes wide with panic. "I-Iida, he-"

"I know," Iida interrupted. _He ran himself to the ground...literally._ "I'm going to move him to the couch. Would you mind…?"

Ochako was nodding before he had the chance to finish speaking, and she reached over, activating her Quirk and gently tapping Izuku on the forehead. After that, it was remarkably easy for Iida to scoop Izuku into his arms and deposit him on the couch.

But not before he realized just how thin his friend had become.

...

Dragging his awareness from the abyss of unconsciousness was no simple feat. Izuku's head was pounding, his throat tight, and his limbs felt like lead. His mind was full of fog, his eyelids heavier than ever, and for the life of him, he couldn't remember what had happened.

"Midoriya?"

"Deku? Are you awake?"

It wasn't so much the question as it was the concern ebbed deep into the question that made Izuku crack his eyes open. Everything was blurry for a moment or two, but when his vision cleared, he made out the anxious faces of Iida and Ochako leaning over him.

"...What happened…?" he managed to ask, setting his palms against either side of the couch and pushing himself upright. Doing so proved harder than he'd hoped, but he managed it.

Ochako reached out as though to help him, but she never touched him. "...You fainted, Deku..." Ochako said quietly.

And Izuku remembered. He remembered the dizziness, the lightheadedness, the feeling like something was slowly but steadily overcoming his senses, and then…

...And then nothing at all.

He'd blacked out.

In front of Iida and Ochako.

The two people he'd been trying the hardest to hide everything from.

A familiar painful, empty, hollow feeling returned to his chest, and he tried in vain to swallow back the lump in his throat.

 _I really_ can't _do anything right, can I…?_

"You...you weren't out for very long, but…" Ochako swallowed hard and looked away. "Deku…"

Izuku took in a breath. He'd kept up his wall this long; now was _not_ the time to let it come crashing down. He couldn't tell his friends about it. He literally _couldn't_. One, because it would break commitments and promises he'd made, and two, because he couldn't burden his friends. He just _couldn't_. He'd rather suffer twice as much alone than to suffer less but have his friends suffer with him.

So he didn't.

"I-I'm sorry," he said, and his voice shook and cracked pathetically. He was having a really, _really_ hard time keeping his act together, but he could be stubborn when he wanted to be.

 _Just a little longer. Keep it up just a little bit longer._

"I-I don't know what came over me," he said, and it hurt. It almost physically _hurt_ to lie to his friends, but what was he supposed to do? He had no answer. He had no _clue_. "I-I really am fine, I...I promise."

 _It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts-_

And then, Iida growled. Not groan or sigh, but _actually growled_. The usually level-headed student suddenly got to his feet, staring Izuku down with a harsh, angry look on his face.

"'You're fine'?" Iida repeated lowly. " _'You're fine'?_ Do you really think we're going to believe that, Midoriya?"

"You're lying to us, Deku," Ochako said, her voice sounding more pained and desperate than ever. "You're lying, we know you are. We...we know you're not okay. No matter how many times you say it, we know."

Izuku's composure cracked.

 _Dangitdangitdangitdangit-_

"I can't...n-no, I can't...I can't _not_ be 'okay,'" Izuku stammered helplessly. "T-There...there are people who are c-counting on me…"

 _All Might. Eri. The entire world looking for their "Symbol of Peace."_

"I-I can't...I c-can't _not be okay."_

"What do you mean, 'You can't not be okay'?" Iida questioned, not rhetorically, either. Like he was genuinely curious, like he _literally could not understand_ what would possess Izuku to think this way.

"Deku, what do you…?" Ochako started, but her voice died in her throat early on.

Iida, meanwhile, plunged ahead. "What are you talking about? It's not _wrong_ to face hardships, Midoriya! It's not _wrong_ to hurt, to _need help_ , to rely on other people! But _this_ …"

He gestured frantically with his hands in Izuku's general direction.

" _This_ is wrong! _This_ is most _certainly_ not okay!" Iida told him. "Driving yourself to the ground, pushing past your limit...it's wrong, and I won't stand for it anymore! I'm not going to sit back and watch you destroy yourself!"

Izuku swallowed hard. This wasn't what he wanted. He'd worried so many people already, and now Iida and Ochako...he was just making everything worse. For everyone.

"I-I'm fine on my own," Izuku tried, but his voice was just _pathetic_ now, his arguments weak and invalid. "I-I don't...I don't want…to burden anyone..."

"Deku, _no!"_ Ochako cried suddenly, like he'd said some horrible thing. "That's...that's not it! You're not burdening us, _any_ of us! We love you, Deku, that's why we're all worried!"

It was getting harder and harder to keep everything bottled up. "This...this...it's not about you!" he countered, his voice cracking. "It's my problem! I don't...I don't want it to be your problem, too!"

"You're _missing the point_ , Midoriya!" Iida said. "We're your friends! This _does_ concern us! You're only hurting yourself, and us, too! We want to help you, so why do you insist on pushing us away!?"

Izuku choked on his next resort, bringing a hand up to cover his mouth. His will to fight was crumbling. Tears burned his eyes.

Iida sat down on the edge of the coffee table beside Ochako again, finally managing to regain some of his composure. He took in a long, deep breath, then spoke. "I understand there are some things you can't talk about," said Iida, suddenly very quiet, "but...we're _here for you_. Always. Whatever you're going through...you don't have to do it alone."

And that was it. That dealt the final blow. Izuku shoved his head into his hands, trying to hide the tears that suddenly flowed. He didn't know _how_ , but...someway or another, his friends had broken through. They'd torn down the isolating wall he'd put up.

Ochako lunged forward and hugged him, her arms wound tightly around his shaking shoulders. And his facade suddenly didn't matter anymore, the "I'm okay" act was shattered, and he hugged her back and sobbed, still just as overwhelmed but not nearly as burdened.

Iida followed Ochako's lead, sitting down on the couch beside his friends and wrapping his arms around the both of them. There was something very protective, firm and gentle about Iida's embrace that was different than Ochako's, and Izuku wondered, briefly, if that's what it would be like to be hugged by an older brother.

At this point, Izuku completely abandoned all sense of composure and... _cried_. And not _just_ cried, either, but flat-out _sobbed_. Every breath he managed to gasp was broken, ragged and harsh, and he was shaking so badly it was almost ridiculous.

He was a mess. He was a complete, broken _mess_.

And yet…

 _And yet Ochako and Iida didn't pull away._

If anything, they actually seemed to hold him tighter. Even though it all, even after _lying_ to them, even after making them worry, even after pushing them away, even after ignoring them, even after brushing off their questions and avoiding confrontations…

Even after _all of that_ …

...They still _cared_ about him _._ They still _loved_ him. They were still his _best friends_.

"You're not alone, Deku," Ochako whispered, squeezing him tighter. "You're not alone. _You're not alone_."

She repeated it like some kind of a chant, over and over again, softly but firmly both at once. She was trying to drive it home, to make sure he _remembered_ it.

 _I'm not alone._

 _No, actually...I was never_ _alone to begin with._

His throat started to ache, his sobs painful and harsh, but he didn't care. He needed this closure, this comfort, this _support_.

He needed his friends. He didn't know where he would be without them.

It took time - a _long_ time - but Izuku finally stopped crying, and he pulled away with some reluctance, not quite ready to let go. He wiped his eyes with the backs of his hands, sniffling.

"T-Thanks, y-you guys…" he managed. His shoulders felt lighter now, and his chest wasn't tight anymore. "I-I'm...I'm sorry...f-for…" He couldn't quite find the words for what he wanted to say, though.

 _For pushing you away. For ignoring you. For brushing you off._

 _For everything_.

When he lowered his hands and looked at his friends, he realized they already understood. They knew him well enough; he didn't have to explain himself.

"It's alright, Midoriya," said Iida with a smile, reaching over and squeezing his shoulder reassuringly. "We forgive you. But don't do it again, alright?"

Ochako nodded feverishly in agreement. Her eyes were slightly red and puffy; she'd been crying, too. She looked like she wanted to hug him again, but held back to give him some space.

"I...I can't tell you everything," Izuku said, "but...but next time, I'll make sure to tell you...i-if I need someone's help…"

Ochako nodded again, even more feverishly than before. "But first-!" She rose to her feet with purpose. "I'm going to make you something to eat!"

Izuku blinked. "Heh?"

"Yes, I agree!" said Iida, catching on. "How does rice sound? Rice is a good comfort food, isn't it?"

Izuku's appetite hadn't exactly returned, but he couldn't remember the last time he'd actually sat down and _eaten_ something, so it sounded like a pretty good idea. "S-Sure, that sounds great," Izuku said. "I-I can help, too, if you want-" He made a move to stand - but didn't get very far.

"No you don't," said Iida, pushing him back down by his shoulder. "You stay here and rest, and _I_ will help Uraraka."

Izuku opened his mouth, ready to object...

 _"You're not alone."_

...Then stopped at the last second.

"...Okay," Izuku relented with a small nod. This was all part of the whole "letting his friends help him" process. They weren't offering to help because they _had to_ , they were offering to help because they _wanted_ to, because they _cared_ about him.

Izuku could let them handle this.

Iida smiled again, then stood and followed Ochako into the kitchen.

Izuku waited up for a bit and listened for a bit, catching small tidbits of "Where did we put that pot?" and "If Kaminari rearranged the pantry again, I swear…" and "Why do we have _seven open bags of rice!?"_ but then, all at once and all too suddenly, Izuku's exhaustion caught up with him, and he couldn't keep his eyes open anymore.

He laid down on the couch, his eyes closed and his heart beating steadily. The problems weren't yet fixed, of course; Eri was still a captive, One For All still needed to be utilized, the League of Villains were still out there, but…

...But it didn't seem nearly as _impossible_ or _hopeless_ anymore. All around, Izuku felt more emotionally and mentally _stable_ now, and now that he _was_ , he'd be able to find solutions to the problems, he'd be able to work it out.

It was going to be okay. Somehow, no matter how impossible it seemed, it was going to be okay.

Izuku fell asleep and slept soundly for the first time that week, a feeling of warmth and contentment settling in his heart.

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

 **Because this precious sunshine child has been through so much and I really want to hug him. Especially since some of the more recent manga chapters (or, semi-recent ones). I mean, this kid's like, what, 16 right now? And he's shouldering all this responsibility and I mean...it's crazy. He's been through so much. He needs a hug (which is why I had Ochako and Iida give him one from me).**

 **Anyways, thanks for reading! I've got a couple more BNHA stories I want to post soon, most of them one-shots ranging from cute and lighthearted to really angsty and hurt/comfort-y, so I hope you guys stick around long enough to see what I've got coming. :)**

 **Thanks for reading! Feel free to let me know what you think in the review section below! :D**

 **Cheers! (PLUS ULTRA! :D)**

 **-BeyondTheClouds777**


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